My Heart

every evening is the same,
i look for my heart,
a little here,
and a little out there,
sometimes feeling lost,
at others, a lot certain,
it beat for me, then
i know it beats for me now, too
the little birdie tells me so

last evening,
as the winter breeze
numbed my face,
and the numbness grew as the evening grew,
it reminded of the numbness,
of the december skies,
when my heart'd sing for me,
it bled for me,
it raced for me,
it choked up, and it teared up 
for me.
as the dew settled on my eyes,
or, was it the dew within?
i know,
somewhere deep down there,
wherever you are, my heart,
you'd still be humming, 
praying and craving,
under a november sky

this evening,
i found my heart,
between the smiles and the tears,
between hope and despair,
between the soaked pillows
and the moist pallus,
hid neatly from everyone,
in the dark of the night,
between the pages of her diary flapping,
and my unmissable clock ticking



© sashikant mohanty