She Was a Star Tonight

the night was dark,
eerie and freezing like death,
like never before,
as if
the vacuum grew 
larger than the universe,
but for the star,
that hung in the sky,
quiet,
while there was a lot to speak;
while his impatience grew,
to hear the nightingale's voice,
she endured a different war within,
whether to melt again,
or, let his heart crack 

the night was dark,
the distances,
tough for the mind to assess,
but the star hung in the sky,
as if wanting to
see him, speak to him
to make up for the weeks
lost in between,
but she fought a strange war within,
whether to melt again,
or, let his heart crumble 

the night was dark,
when the air stood still,
as the star kept a watch
over him,
as he held her
in his gaze,
a teardrop oozed,
from his eyes,
none said a word,
yet had volumes to talk,
but she fought a tough war within,
whether to melt again,
or, let his heart break 

that she's a star,
was not unknown to him,
the way she'd shine,
the ways she'd stay up,
night after night,
the way she'd spread smiles,
the way she'd stood
like a rock,
come rain, come shine,
the way she'd stand firm
through days, and nights,
over the years,
away from the glare,
but she was a star tonight,
tucked in the sky,
out there watching him,
as his gaze stayed fixed,
and a prayer slipped his lips,
as if wishing upon
a shooting star,
and there, she fought a painful war within,
whether to melt,
or, let the hearts break, again!





© sashikant mohanty

Fadeless Smiles

your care and concern
was as infectious
as your smile,
your heart,
as large as the universe
would aim to be

from a distant memory,
many frames
flash like an endless roll,
the way you'd feed me,
with tender motherly care,
the way you calmed me,
when i was upset, or sore,
the way you'd open the door.
with a smile on your face,
as if i was a son,
from another womb,
the rare moments,
you'd let the tears overflow,
i hope you found warmth,
as you snuggled
against a son's chest,
as i tried to repay,
the debts of gratitude and love,
i carried in my soul

the last time, we met,
is too recent to be a memory,
yet too distant to be recent anymore,
you didn't miss to ask,
checking on all,
mother, wife, daughter, and son,
brothers, sisters, their families,
and all,
friends and their children,
near and far,
and the words spelled blessings,
as if you strung them close,
as if you knew
what was in store

that day,
you signed off with
“come home when you are here next!”
i've kept my word, today
that i gave, that day,
i’ve come back, mausi,
but where are you?
your smile is etched all over,
and your voice echoes even more,
but the quiet eyes
and the fadeless smiles,
in the portrait on the wall,
tells our journey was thus far,
as i dread a long wait,  
and try to convince my senses
you're no more!




© sashikant mohanty

You Leave Me More Alone

don't be my sweet,
the sweeter you become,
the more you're a mirage,
the closer i try to be,
the farther you appear,
and you leave me more alone

don't be my moon,
and never a blue moon,
the more i believe,
that we share a soul,
the more i feel your warmth,
you leave me more alone

don't be a visitor in my dreams,
the moments,
you flash across my sleep,
you make up for several lives,
but every time i open my eyes,
you leave me more alone

don't be my hope,
the closer you're wrapped to my chest,
the more i nurse you,
the greater is the pain in hope,
the closer you're to me,
the more i break,
and you leave me more alone

don't be my life, my sweet,
the more you give wings to them,
the tougher it gets
when you leave,
the way your heart beats in me,
the hundred ways you speak
to me in silence,
the more deafening it gets
when you're gone,
and you leave me more alone

don't be my love,
the more you're part of me,
the more you'll be hurt,
by my love,
don't be my love ever,
even when your heart is weak,
don't spare me,
even a small corner in your heart,
for when that corner
would be closed for me
you'll leave me more alone



© sashikant mohanty

Melt Tonight

today,

i'm caught

in the crosswinds,
as i trade my life,
to keep us alive,

as i burn myself,
to keep them glowing,

the light and my dreams,

as i tend to your wounds,
looking away from my own,

and hard, 

i try to keep hope alive

today,

I'm caught

fighting the tides of dark,

as they pound
the poor flickering light,

as i stand helpless,
and lonely,
between life and lifelessness,
between living and existing,

with prayers as my only might,

and belief in you brighter far, than light

today,

i'm lost,

between the storms of memories,

and the tsunami of dreams,

between lamenting the wrongs,

and swallowing of the rights,

between the whispers,
with eyes shut tight,

as i wake from a dream,
starry and bright

with a ray of hope, frail yet bright,

that you'd melt,

tonight



© sashikant mohanty

Love Is a Prayer

love is a prayer,

both simple and profound,

both deep and unwavering,

how often,

when and where you lean on it,

and what all is in it,

no one knows,

other than you

love is like a prayer,

once you start,

there is no stopping,

once it becomes a habit,

there is no going back,

where it all started,

when it became breathing,

no one will ever know,

not even you

love is like a prayer,

both rooted deep in belief,

and cemented in trust,

but neither needing words,

both founded on hope,

but neither expecting,

how strong, and deep,

nobody ever fathomed

not even you

love is more than a prayer,

one for god you've never seen,

don't know if he even listens,

don't know what he looks like,

don't know if he has time for you

but still, you pray;

the other

is for a god you've seen,

seen flesh and blood,

you've known she listens,

you know her heart melts,

you've smelled,

and heard her breath

you know is yearning for your breath,

you're sure her heart beats for you,

loving is praying a lot more,

nobody will ever know of,

not even your god!

© sashikant mohanty

Another Day

another day has rolled by,
it took long,
very long, maybe years,
as i struggled
between hope and despair,
between giving up and a silent prayer,
another day dragged by

another day has rolled by,
it refused to start,
without hearing your sweet voice,
looking back,
i don't complain
how few those words,
and how hurried, those calls,
but between tears and a long wait,
another day dragged by

another day has rolled by,
it's taken ages, and
as i'm drained and tired,
every bit,
and as i almost resigned,
as my heart has paused,
and my tears dried,
without hearing
nightingale's voice,
as i couldn't be sure,
if you still hold
the same people in your prayers,
another day refuses to pass by!





© sashikant mohanty