I Cry

sometimes
i cry when i'm lonely,
sometimes, i go looking for solitude,
to cry,
sometimes, the tears force their way
when i'm lost in the crowds, yet alone,
at others, i make peace with -
that's how it's meant to be

sometimes it's the loneliness,
that makes me feel blue,
more often, it's the despair
that i couldn't fill your void,
when you stood alone,
that makes my eyes well up

sometimes, i wonder
why god penned it this way,
but then, i wonder,
who to plead with -
when my god is you

sometimes
i choke up when i'm with you,
often, i have a lump in throat
just to be with you,
sometimes, i well up feeling your grace
at others,
it's asking for your grace
sometimes,
it's the flashes from memories,
that i cry my eyes out,
many times,
it's the undying desire to create
a few more

sometimes,
it's your concern and fondness
escaping the guarded lips
that moves me to tears,
but at other times,
it's the endless wait
for a few more golden words

sometimes,
i wish to be in your arms
to let go of the bottled up feelings,
but, most often,
i dream of you in mine,
as you melt, one day,
hopefully soon
and let me seal the smile
that i'm used to every day,
in my dreams!





© sashikant mohanty