Tonight, The Winds Are Quiet

tonight
the night is pitch dark,
voider than void,
darker far than
any new moon night,
there is none i can see,
maybe,
none i'm looking forward to,
for nobody is waiting tonight,
none ever waited,
to meet,
to listen to,
and be listened to,
to talk to,
and be talked to

tonight,
the winds are quiet,
as if they've stopped breathing,
not a blade of leaf stirred,
even the murmur of breath
has got quieter,
everything's so still,
it's not cold,
yet,
but it feels like,
it feels, and smells like death,
am i close to home?
a thought flashes
as a rare waft pats my cheeks

tonight,
she's not looking for me,
she never really did,
maybe she did,
and not let me know,
or,i dreamt that way,
for years,
and hoped, and prayed
even believed,
stronger by the day
lately, 
several hundred nights
when her thoughts,
and her dreams kept me up,
while she slept,
i liked it that way,
the way she sleeps,
like a baby,
but tonight,
my head is hurting,
eyes heavy, too 
and my heart - tired,
mind unusually numb to wander,
or feel,
and it's my turn to sleep
for long,
for ever, maybe!





© sashikant mohanty